October 8 2005

Well gang, we’re only two weeks away from this year’s benefit to help kids that wish things were better.
Don’t forget October 22nd , a Saturday. It all starts at high noon. Five bands, great food. Five bucks a head, at the West Alabama Ice House.
Everything is starting to get exciting. One of the bands even went so far as to have a practice session so that they would be ready for the big day. Not everybody showed up, but what the hell, they’re trying, right?
Folks are rummaging through attics, garages and closets looking for items for the silent auction.
On just such a search, Howard Dimwitty found an old side by side shotgun that had belonged to his grandfather. He knew that guns weren’t allowed at the auction, but he picked it up anyway, took it out back and slipped a couple of 12 gauge shells into the firing chambers, took aim at a can that he had set on a post, and pulled the trigger.
Had he checked the barrels of the shotgun before hand, Howard would have found that over the years some critters had made the inside of those barrels their home. But he didn’t check.
Consequently, he ruined the gun, dislocated his shoulder, and tore the top out of a two hundred and fifty dollar straw hat.
The cooks are getting ready too. These boys and girls are really competitive this year. There has already been two divorces, one separation, several friendships of fifteen or twenty years have gone sour, and three fist fights that were of Hollywood movie quality.
In fact, one of the fights was video-taped by someone. You might want to ask around.
Ain’t it just plain wonderful how charity work tends to bring out the Texas in us Texans?

Till next week
Helga Biermeister
Secretary