November 5 2005

Well gang, there’s old news this week. This chronicle appeared in the newspaper on June 16th 1999.
Good news, odd news.
The good news is that all indications are pointing toward a monthly meeting of the Montrose Beer and Gun Club June 27th, 1999.
The odd news is that there has been an accident.
It seems that Clyde Patterson, chairman of the Party Committee, was out at the range this week mowing the grass on the 1000 yard rifle range , when he got caught in one of those frog-strangler thunderstorms that we get out that way. He and Josh Walker had already put the mowers away and were starting on their second case of beer when the storm hit.
It is reported that they grabbed the igloo of beer, jumped into Clyde’s old pick-up, and were headed off the range when the wind shield wipers stopped and the lights in the cab went out.
"It’s probably just a fuse" Josh is said to have remarked.
Clyde reached over and fished around in the glove compartment for a fuse and inserted it in the fuse box. The lights and wind shield wipers came to life, and they grinned at each other, sipped a fresh beer and continued down the road.
On later examination, the fuse turned out to be a .22 cal. Mini-mag that did an admirable job as a fuse, up until the point when it got hot enough to explode. The tiny round shot through the bottom of the fuse box, bounced off the clutch pedal, went through the can of beer that Clyde was drinking, and blew off Clyde’s left nostril before putting a hole in his brand new Stetson.
Josh Walker, naturally, was laughing so hard that he had tears running down his face, and couldn’t drink his beer without blowing half of it out his nose, which, of course, got Clyde laughing too.
"Damn it Josh !" Laughed Clyde, drinking blood from his nose with his beer, "This is no laughing matter! A Stetson is a Stetson!"
It sure will be great to see those boys again.

Till next week
Helga Biermeister
Secretary