August 6 2005

This past week one of our members, Gordon Goldleaf the antique dealer, noticed his dog "Teepee" favoring her left hind foot and licking on it a lot.
He looked at it and saw that she had gashed it some how, and decided that he would take the chance of straining his relationship with the animal by taking her to the veterinarian. She just loved going to the vet.
It was going to be a great inconvenience for him also, because he had more than just a touch of stomach virus and was feeling pretty green around the gills. But it was the right thing to do.
Well, "Teepee" wound up getting the works; poked at, thumped on, temperaturized, disinfected, bandaged, tetanus shot, the whole works.
On the way back home, with the windows up and the A/C on high, "Teepee" apparently succumbed to the need to evacuate some gas from her system.
Now everyone knows that dogs are notorious for the vileness of their contributions to the world of flatulence, but this particular emanation was one that could only be measured on a heroic, if not biblical scale of foulness.
Goldleaf took about half a breath, turned to the passenger seat, and hollered "Teepee"! "Teepee" turned and gave Goldleaf a poker faced look, and then looked out the window panting in those little short pants that make dogs look like they’re going "Heh, heh, heh" with a kind of little smile. You know the kind.
Goldleaf quickly rolled down his window for fresh air, only to discover to his horror, that the noxious cloud had to flow past him in order to leave the truck.
There was nothing left to do. He pulled over to the side of the street, and fell out of the truck onto a nicely mowed patch of grass. Retching for all he was worth.
Just as he was getting his breath back, Goldleaf was surprised by an extremely polite but official sounding voice saying, "What seems to be the problem here Sir?"
Goldleaf gave the officer his stomach virus story, and the officer gave Goldleaf his field sobriety test. After checking drivers license and proof of insurance, the officer decided to let Goldleaf go about his business.
The officer watched Goldleaf getting back into his truck, and noticed "Teepee" on the passenger seat with a bandaged foot. "Nice little dog," he said, "got a bum foot huh?"
"Yeah," said Goldleaf, "I was just bringing her back from the vet."
"Might be a good idea for you to go see a vet yourself." Said the policeman as he turned and walked away.
"Teepee" glanced at the policeman’s departure, and started panting in short pants again. And again it looked like she was going "Heh, heh, heh," and grinning, as if the policeman had said something funny.
You gotta believe that dogs would like to take their owners to the veterinarian. Just once.