November 04 2006

Well gang, here we are, just a few days away from mid-term elections, and “Kinky” Friedman who is running for governor is a member of the Montrose Beer and Gun Club. It is the first time that a member of the club has run for political office since “Ralph the plumber” ran for mayor of Houston on the slogan “Flush out city hall”. This is not to suggest that we should necessarily vote for “Kinky”. After all, the club’s original charter declares the club as being a bipartisan and non-denominational organization.

  You see, the original founders of the club figured that our members should be too intelligent to dabble in politics, and at the same time, too dumb to figure out what religion was all about. Considering that we are a culture dedicated to beer and guns, this was not such a bad idea, in as much as political or religious discussions between gun toting beer drinkers are known to occasionally get carried away. A recent case in point, that will make your heart feel proud, took plce just last Tuesday. “Blue” Martin and Marcel Rouge were cooking up a mess of crappies in Marcel’s back yard, along with a couple of the boys. There were some women folk and a few kids there too.

  Well somehow, after a few beers, the talk turned to politics, and Marcel and “Blue” found themselves on opposite sides of the issue of how the Republicans should be dealt with this election. “Blue” had all kinds of suggestions, the most benign of which was tarring and feathering. Marcel responded by casting quite colorful and creative dispersions on the democrats. Their language got to the point where the women folk had to run the kids inside. Finally, Marcel stopped casting dispersions, and cast a bowl of first class home made red sauce at “Blue”, hitting him on the side of the head.

  And the fight was on.

 For about Five minutes it raged across the back yard, down the drive way, and was headed across the front yard, when Marcel backed off and pointed at “Blue”. “My God!” exclaimed Marcel, “You’re packing heat! I’d never have hit you with that red sauce, I’d have known that!” “Yeah,” said “Blue”, “and I see that you’re carrying too. If I’d a known that, I wouldn’t have talked politics with you to begin with.” Marcel looked down at the ground. Looked back at “Blue” and said,   “Maybe I should make some more red sauce.”

  “I’d prefer blue sauce.” Said Blue. “Don’t get me started!” said Marcel. As the two began to grin, Marcel’s wife came out on the front porch and hollered “Quit your foolin’ around, and get in the back yard. Already made more sauce, and it’s tartar. What ever you do gang, don’t forget to vote.

  Vote early.

  Vote often.

Till next week
Helga Biermeister
Secretary