June 23 2007

Well gang, as we know from last week, the Montrose Beer and Gun Club shooting ranges, were closed down on June 23rd 1999 by Sheriff Tom Long.
And Vernon Hotchkiss managed to drill four holes in the seat of his pants. At the time, it was assumed that the good Sheriff’s decision was motivated by the destruction of his favorite pipe.
When told over the phone that he might have over-reacted just a little, Tom asked the caller if the caller was familiar with his famous handle-bar moustache. The caller said that he was.
"Well, the damned thing has only one handle-bar now!" Tom screamed into the phone.
It was suggested that Tom could wear a false moustache on one side until it grew out. With words not quite so politically correct, Tom inquired whether the caller was suggesting that he (Tom) should resort to wearing make-up like some damn sissy.
From that point the conversation headed straight south. It may take a while to get negotiations with the good Sheriff on firmer ground, the caller thought.
Vern Hotchkiss, on the other hand, was in good spirits.
The four extra holes in his posterior have made him the hero of the local taproom, and friends had taken to driving him to and from the watering hole, laying belly down, in a pick-up truck with a mattress in the bed.
As it were.
Vern says that the doctor told him that the bad part was that it might take a year or two for the splinters from the bar stool to work their way out.
Ouch!
The price of fame.

Till next week
Helga Biermeister
Secretary