January 5 2008
Well gang, as you may or may not recall, it was announced last week that we are aiming for July fourth for a reopening of the clubhouse and ranges and that range committee members were encouraged to go out there, survey the damage, and write up a report.
Last Saturday and Sunday and part of Monday that is just what they did.
But most of Monday was spent in preparations for a New Years Eve party; barbecue, a few kegs of beer, and a hand gun competition.
At the stroke of midnight, Cindy Prendergast’s Patton tank would fire a round at one of the targets on the anti-tank gun range. And they would all thank their lucky stars that this July fourth 2008, we would finally be having a full-blown meeting out at the club house and ranges. Ten long years since the last one.
Well, the barbecue went just fine, the shooting competition went about as well as could be expected, and the beer sort of held it all together.
After about half an hour, a flock of Texas Ranger cruisers showed up. Lights all flashing and everything, and they seemed unhappy about something.
The shooting stopped. The troopers got out of their cars and approached the committee members in a cautious kind of way.
Suddenly, it dawned on our boys and girls that no one had alerted the authorities that our people were going to be there.
With both of his hands held up high, one of the club house committee members got to talking to the man in charge, trying to explain the situation to him.
About a quarter mile away, Cindy Prendergast sat in her Patton tank, buttoned up with Sheriff Tom Long, her number one squeeze.
Now when they found themselves together in close quarters, they just couldn’t keep their hands off of each other. Especially when they were in that damned tank.
The head of the Texas Rangers was just coming around to seeing things our way, when Cindy and Tom, consumed by passion, bouncing around in the innards of the tank, hit exactly those things necessary to fire off the round from the cannon.
The cannon had been loaded and aimed at a target on the anti-tank gun range, but when the shell hit the target it bounced off and proceeded to destroy a Texas Ranger cruiser that had been parked in exactly the wrong place.
Well, it seems that Wolfgang Schellcasing, our club lawyer, has a little more legal work to do for us, and Sheriff Tom Long is embarrassed as all get out by screwing up in front of his fellow law enforcement officers.
It also didn’t do him any good when one of the committee members reminded him that the cannon wasn’t supposed to go off until midnight.
"You were just a little premature there, weren’t you Tom?" he said.
Cindy took Tom’s hand. "No he wasn’t." she said, "He wasn’t premature at all." And she smiled sweetly as she led Tom away.

Till next week
Helga Biermeister
Secretary